Whatever it Takes

By Bernadine J. McIntosh

"Whatever it takes!" Gina thought to herself. It was the first day of school and Gina had come with a new attitude. "I'm not going to be a geek this year," she thought.

Gina had a plan. Her first step was to try to get into the popular group by befriending one of the popular girls. "This year is going to be different she thought. I'm going to be popular!!"

What's wrong with this picture? Is it wrong to want to be popular?
Believe it or not, there's nothing wrong with wanting to be popular. However, what is important is how you achieve your popularity. Popularity can become a negative thing when:

You become popular by negative means. Achieving your popularity by stepping on others or using others so you can get what you want causes needless pain. It can also cause you to lose the friends you do have.

You forget who you are. If you try to achieve popularity by changing to fit in with a certain group you are not being true to yourself. Real friends will accept you for who you are.

You do whatever it takes to fit in. Think about it. Is being popular so important to you that you will do anything to achieve popularity? How far will you go to fit in? Will you spread gossip, make fun of others, drink, or do drugs? If you have to do all of this to be popular do you really want to be popular?

So how do you achieve popularity? Well first of all ditch Gina's plan. In fact don't even try to be popular. Just try to:

Accept and respect others. Don't feel that everyone has to be just like you or vice versa.

Do the right thing! Doing what you know is right even in the face of pressure, takes strength, confidence and integrity.

Don't focus on being popular. Instead of focusing on your need to be accepted, practice accepting others. Find others who like the things you like, join a club, start playing a sport, start a club… Before you know it, you'll be so busy hanging around with your new friends you won't have time to worry about popularity.

Sept/Nov 2001