By Bernadine McIntosh
"Oh my goodness!" I gasped as I looked into the mirror. Imagine my surprise at waking up one morning at age twenty something to a face covered with pimples. This was definitely not a good start to my day. " I thought I'd left all of that behind. How in the world did I get all of these pimples overnight", I thought to myself.
I immediately got out my Clinique cleanser and a cotton ball and began frantically scrubbing. But of course we know they don't disappear immediately. "How am I going to go out in public looking like this," I thought, vanity immediately kicking in. "Everyone's going to notice." Make up of course was a no-no because I didn't want to make it even worse. Ever been there? Well I'd been there all through my teen years. I'd paid my dues or so I thought.
Acne is a skin problem that is common to most teenagers. It is a problem that can cause uncertainty and self-consciousness. It feels as if everyone is staring at you, which usually isn't the case. However, if you wake up one morning to a face covered with pimples, or as we Bahamians say a "bumpy" face don't fear. It won't last forever. However, here are a few things you can do to minimize the effect of acne on you.
· Cleanse your face properly morning and evening, especially if you wear makeup.
· Dry your face gently with a clean towel.
· Use a mild acne fighting cream.
· Don't use makeup, if you have pimples. (I'm still crying over this one)
· Don't pick or squeeze the pimples (it's tempting I know, but try to resist)
· Try to eat foods that are not so high in fat.
Remember, if you have a skin problem now don't despair. You'll have beautiful, smooth, unblemished skin one day. This too will pass. You're probably wondering if that's true what am I, a woman in her twenties, doing with pimples. Well, I wish I knew. However I'm definitely going to be more vigilant with my facial care routine from now on.
March/May '02
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Emotional Rollercoaster
By Linda Wright
Human beings are complex creatures. We are emotional, social, spiritual, intellectual and physical beings. We are affected by our environment, events, and what people may or may not say to us. As young ladies we are often plagued with our emotions. We just cannot be sure if we can trust them and what they are telling us to do. Our emotions are unreliable at times. We feel happy, sad, angry, excited, overwhelmed and worried in the space of a few minutes.
Strong feelings such as love, anger, fear, joy and sorrow are emotions. Our emotions affect our behavior in many ways in fact, it is often the leading influential factor that determines how we respond to others. A classic example could probably be someone wearing the exact same dress, to your prom. Some of you are probably thinking that, "hey that would make any one upset or feel strong feeling of resentment towards 'that girl'". In fact you may even feel that this situation warrants you not speaking to that girl or making snide comments about the way she looks in "your" dress, such as "oh she's much too fat for that dress," or "don't you think it looks better on me?
Your strong feelings may stem from the fact that as a child you may have worn hand-me-downs and not ever owned anything that was uniquely and originally yours. In fact, just being reminded that someone else has on the exact same thing as you may give you reason to behave in an inappropriate manner.
As young ladies we need to learn how to express our emotions appropriately. There will be times in your life when people may say or do things to you that may make you upset and angry. Someone may just get on your last nerve and in retaliation you may swear and let loose all your pent up frustration. However, uttermost care most be taken when you express yourself. Care should be taken in what we say to others, how we say it and when and where we say it.
Ladies, you should not allow your fears, anger, frustration, rage or any other emotion to get the best of you. Express yourself appropriately. Tell other when they hurt or upset you. If you do so they are less likely to repeat the same thing. Also you are less likely to give into temptation and give them a piece of your mind.
March/May '02
Human beings are complex creatures. We are emotional, social, spiritual, intellectual and physical beings. We are affected by our environment, events, and what people may or may not say to us. As young ladies we are often plagued with our emotions. We just cannot be sure if we can trust them and what they are telling us to do. Our emotions are unreliable at times. We feel happy, sad, angry, excited, overwhelmed and worried in the space of a few minutes.
Strong feelings such as love, anger, fear, joy and sorrow are emotions. Our emotions affect our behavior in many ways in fact, it is often the leading influential factor that determines how we respond to others. A classic example could probably be someone wearing the exact same dress, to your prom. Some of you are probably thinking that, "hey that would make any one upset or feel strong feeling of resentment towards 'that girl'". In fact you may even feel that this situation warrants you not speaking to that girl or making snide comments about the way she looks in "your" dress, such as "oh she's much too fat for that dress," or "don't you think it looks better on me?
Your strong feelings may stem from the fact that as a child you may have worn hand-me-downs and not ever owned anything that was uniquely and originally yours. In fact, just being reminded that someone else has on the exact same thing as you may give you reason to behave in an inappropriate manner.
As young ladies we need to learn how to express our emotions appropriately. There will be times in your life when people may say or do things to you that may make you upset and angry. Someone may just get on your last nerve and in retaliation you may swear and let loose all your pent up frustration. However, uttermost care most be taken when you express yourself. Care should be taken in what we say to others, how we say it and when and where we say it.
Ladies, you should not allow your fears, anger, frustration, rage or any other emotion to get the best of you. Express yourself appropriately. Tell other when they hurt or upset you. If you do so they are less likely to repeat the same thing. Also you are less likely to give into temptation and give them a piece of your mind.
March/May '02
Waiting for True Love
by Kristin Yarbrough
His hands moved up her back; his lips caressed her neck. True love waits. This isn't love, Alex thought, but it feels good. Yeah, true love waits, but waits for how long? How much? As long as she didn't go all the way, right? She broke away from him and glanced at her ring and whispered the inscription, "True love waits." I wonder if my true love is waiting for me...
Through various slogans and discussions, the female population has been taught to wait for true love. But wait for what? Wait to date? For a kiss? For sex? Well, I offer you this insight, as a college girl who has had her heart broken many a time and is currently waiting for true love.
Let's start with something "simple": dating. Personally, I think, girls shouldn't start dating until they're emotionally ready, which varies with the individual. Society creates too much hype about the importance of having a boyfriend. I swear we've got it all wrong. In junior high, a couple didn't actually go anywhere, but we called it "going out". In high school, two people like each other and then are considered an "item" and dating. But does anyone really date anymore? If you were to time warp to our parent's generation, you'd find that dating meant taking more than one person out and then "go steady" with someone that you liked more than the restof the people you've dated. Today it seems like we have it backwards. Most of the people I've observed become a couple before actually dating. Sadly, this leaves young women lost in the world of men that actually want to date (more than one person at a time) without having a serious relationship.
My suggestion is this: get to know yourself first. You can't ever dump yourself! You'll always be there! Once you've taken care of yourself, get to know the people you're interested in. From there, take it easy. Be open with the person of your attention and be honest about your dating views.
Next, if you date, set boundaries. Here's one way to set boundaries (Read before actually trying it!) Close your eyes and picture the man you want to spend the rest of your life with. Don't give him a name or a face, just imagine his shadows. Imagine that it's your wedding night. He turns to you and smiles. He leans in close and whispers ever so gently, "Honey, after knowing you for ______ years, I've finally fallen in love with you and have promised to share the rest of my life with you. I've waited for you since I can remember. The only thing I've ever done is...." Is? I don't want an is! I want it to stop at "remember". Okay, highly unlikely, but hey, that's my fantasy! Here's your job: take what you filled in at the end. If you feel truly comfortable knowing that your potential mate has been that intimate with someone else, rather than waiting for you, then that is where your
boundary line lies. Just remember, you may be okay with his experience, but he may not be comfortable with yours.
Romance and love is special--make it special. Why waste all those glances, poems, smiles, and kisses on just anybody? Waiting for someone special, especially for true love, shows that you value the next person you date so much that you considered your relationship before you even met. What if a guy did that for you? Wouldn't that just make you get that "aw-gee" look on your face? So from me to you, dear reader, please remember, "True love waits… for marriage"; we're all worth waiting for!
Dec '01/Feb '02
His hands moved up her back; his lips caressed her neck. True love waits. This isn't love, Alex thought, but it feels good. Yeah, true love waits, but waits for how long? How much? As long as she didn't go all the way, right? She broke away from him and glanced at her ring and whispered the inscription, "True love waits." I wonder if my true love is waiting for me...
Through various slogans and discussions, the female population has been taught to wait for true love. But wait for what? Wait to date? For a kiss? For sex? Well, I offer you this insight, as a college girl who has had her heart broken many a time and is currently waiting for true love.
Let's start with something "simple": dating. Personally, I think, girls shouldn't start dating until they're emotionally ready, which varies with the individual. Society creates too much hype about the importance of having a boyfriend. I swear we've got it all wrong. In junior high, a couple didn't actually go anywhere, but we called it "going out". In high school, two people like each other and then are considered an "item" and dating. But does anyone really date anymore? If you were to time warp to our parent's generation, you'd find that dating meant taking more than one person out and then "go steady" with someone that you liked more than the restof the people you've dated. Today it seems like we have it backwards. Most of the people I've observed become a couple before actually dating. Sadly, this leaves young women lost in the world of men that actually want to date (more than one person at a time) without having a serious relationship.
My suggestion is this: get to know yourself first. You can't ever dump yourself! You'll always be there! Once you've taken care of yourself, get to know the people you're interested in. From there, take it easy. Be open with the person of your attention and be honest about your dating views.
Next, if you date, set boundaries. Here's one way to set boundaries (Read before actually trying it!) Close your eyes and picture the man you want to spend the rest of your life with. Don't give him a name or a face, just imagine his shadows. Imagine that it's your wedding night. He turns to you and smiles. He leans in close and whispers ever so gently, "Honey, after knowing you for ______ years, I've finally fallen in love with you and have promised to share the rest of my life with you. I've waited for you since I can remember. The only thing I've ever done is...." Is? I don't want an is! I want it to stop at "remember". Okay, highly unlikely, but hey, that's my fantasy! Here's your job: take what you filled in at the end. If you feel truly comfortable knowing that your potential mate has been that intimate with someone else, rather than waiting for you, then that is where your
boundary line lies. Just remember, you may be okay with his experience, but he may not be comfortable with yours.
Romance and love is special--make it special. Why waste all those glances, poems, smiles, and kisses on just anybody? Waiting for someone special, especially for true love, shows that you value the next person you date so much that you considered your relationship before you even met. What if a guy did that for you? Wouldn't that just make you get that "aw-gee" look on your face? So from me to you, dear reader, please remember, "True love waits… for marriage"; we're all worth waiting for!
Dec '01/Feb '02
Accept Yourself
By Linda Wright
Fat, skinny, tall, short, we often hear about how extremely we fit on these sides. As young ladies we often feel that something is wrong with our size, shape, height or a particular body part. We are made to feel that we should look like actresses, models, singers and other famous people. Oftentimes our individuality, the person we are inside is neglected or treated as if it does not exist.
Right now you may be hiding the fact that you don't like how tall, short, fat or skinny you look. STOP! Don't feel ashamed or feel that you are all alone. The truth is that there is a time in every young girl's life when she feels as if she just doesn't look "right"
Let's be honest here. You're in high school and it seems as if looks are the number one thing that everyone is interested in. Hey, guess what? Pretty soon (even as you read this) you will realize that, looks alone, just ain't guh cut it no more.
Your size, shape and height doesn't make you who you are. It is the inner you- who you love and who loves you, where you're going with your life, your dreams and aspirations - the kind of person you are, your character. These are the important things that matter. Of course there are people even in your own circle of friends and your very own family who think that you should lose this or put on that or grow up or shrink some. However, that should not make you untrue to who you are. Disregard what others say. Love yourself!
I have known young ladies who have tried to change who they are. Of course everyone knows that this doesn't work because it just has the opposite affect. But, I can empathize with them and with you because I too felt uncomfortable with how I looked. I had to learn to accept my body, accept the things that I just could not change. So whatever your complaint with your body, learn this prayer written by an unknown author and hopefully your feelings will change.
Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, Courage to change the things that I can and Wisdom to know the difference.
Hey, there will be a lot of people who will say negative things about how you look. There will be people who will do their best to change who you are. On the other hand, there are thousands of people who will accept you just as you are, especially the person in whose image you were created.
Dec '01/Feb '02
Fat, skinny, tall, short, we often hear about how extremely we fit on these sides. As young ladies we often feel that something is wrong with our size, shape, height or a particular body part. We are made to feel that we should look like actresses, models, singers and other famous people. Oftentimes our individuality, the person we are inside is neglected or treated as if it does not exist.
Right now you may be hiding the fact that you don't like how tall, short, fat or skinny you look. STOP! Don't feel ashamed or feel that you are all alone. The truth is that there is a time in every young girl's life when she feels as if she just doesn't look "right"
Let's be honest here. You're in high school and it seems as if looks are the number one thing that everyone is interested in. Hey, guess what? Pretty soon (even as you read this) you will realize that, looks alone, just ain't guh cut it no more.
Your size, shape and height doesn't make you who you are. It is the inner you- who you love and who loves you, where you're going with your life, your dreams and aspirations - the kind of person you are, your character. These are the important things that matter. Of course there are people even in your own circle of friends and your very own family who think that you should lose this or put on that or grow up or shrink some. However, that should not make you untrue to who you are. Disregard what others say. Love yourself!
I have known young ladies who have tried to change who they are. Of course everyone knows that this doesn't work because it just has the opposite affect. But, I can empathize with them and with you because I too felt uncomfortable with how I looked. I had to learn to accept my body, accept the things that I just could not change. So whatever your complaint with your body, learn this prayer written by an unknown author and hopefully your feelings will change.
Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, Courage to change the things that I can and Wisdom to know the difference.
Hey, there will be a lot of people who will say negative things about how you look. There will be people who will do their best to change who you are. On the other hand, there are thousands of people who will accept you just as you are, especially the person in whose image you were created.
Dec '01/Feb '02
Are You Cool or a Fool?
by Shantel Hield
Tonya and Michelle were offered a drink at a party they attended. Michelle refused but Tonya decided to give it a try. "After all what harm can one drink do," she thought to herself. However two hours later she was still drinking. Let's listen in on Tonya and Michelle's conversation.
Tonya - Girl you have to get a sip of this!
Michelle -You know I don't drink.
Tonya - Too bad, this drink is the bomb!
Michelle -What is it?
Tonya - I don't know, but it sure tastes good.
Michelle-You really shouldn't be drinking that. You've had four drinks already.
Tonya - Girl chill out! I feel good and I just want to party, besides, everyone's doing it.
Have you experienced this scene before? If so were you more like Michelle or Tonya? Unfortunately, for many teenage girls the idea of being cool in the eyes of their friend is a number one priority. Consequently, if drinking alcohol makes them popular they are hip to the idea of drinking. They do not think that they can actually become alcoholics.
However, who expects to become an alcoholic? Well, think again! A journey of a million miles begins with one step. That first drink you sip can take you on a road that destroys your future. Alcohol is addictive and habit forming. You don't need to try it to see if you like it. You may like the taste but you won't like the affect it has on your life. I love chocolate, however I don't like what it does to my complexion. Translation, you may like the taste of alcohol but you won't like the effect it has on your life.
You are a beautiful young lady. Why would you want to be associated with something that kills, destroys and humiliates? "How?" you ask. Well first it kills. It kills your personality. You are no longer yourself and no one wants to be around a drunk.
Second it damages. It damages your body. You are no longer healthy and energetic.
Last it humiliates; it humiliates you and your family. When you drink you can't walk straight and you can hardly string two words together. How cool is that?
Don't kid yourself! Drinking is not cool. In fact, alcohol simply makes you act like a fool. Knowing whom you are and what you stand for, that's cool!
Dec '01/Feb '02
Tonya and Michelle were offered a drink at a party they attended. Michelle refused but Tonya decided to give it a try. "After all what harm can one drink do," she thought to herself. However two hours later she was still drinking. Let's listen in on Tonya and Michelle's conversation.
Tonya - Girl you have to get a sip of this!
Michelle -You know I don't drink.
Tonya - Too bad, this drink is the bomb!
Michelle -What is it?
Tonya - I don't know, but it sure tastes good.
Michelle-You really shouldn't be drinking that. You've had four drinks already.
Tonya - Girl chill out! I feel good and I just want to party, besides, everyone's doing it.
Have you experienced this scene before? If so were you more like Michelle or Tonya? Unfortunately, for many teenage girls the idea of being cool in the eyes of their friend is a number one priority. Consequently, if drinking alcohol makes them popular they are hip to the idea of drinking. They do not think that they can actually become alcoholics.
However, who expects to become an alcoholic? Well, think again! A journey of a million miles begins with one step. That first drink you sip can take you on a road that destroys your future. Alcohol is addictive and habit forming. You don't need to try it to see if you like it. You may like the taste but you won't like the affect it has on your life. I love chocolate, however I don't like what it does to my complexion. Translation, you may like the taste of alcohol but you won't like the effect it has on your life.
You are a beautiful young lady. Why would you want to be associated with something that kills, destroys and humiliates? "How?" you ask. Well first it kills. It kills your personality. You are no longer yourself and no one wants to be around a drunk.
Second it damages. It damages your body. You are no longer healthy and energetic.
Last it humiliates; it humiliates you and your family. When you drink you can't walk straight and you can hardly string two words together. How cool is that?
Don't kid yourself! Drinking is not cool. In fact, alcohol simply makes you act like a fool. Knowing whom you are and what you stand for, that's cool!
Dec '01/Feb '02
Dream Big
By Bernadine McIntosh
"Aim for the heavens and you'll fall among the stars!' A good friend recently gave me this advice.
This simply means to dream big. Don't allow your thinking to be limited by what you can see.
You have many dreams for the future, I'm sure. One of your dreams may be to become a lawyer, doctor, businesswomen, teacher, nurse, etc.
Make your dreams your goals, set them high and strive to reach them.
Having set goals is very important, it keeps you focused and give you a sense of purpose.
Whatever your goals in life may be a good education is important. Hence, you have to keep your grades up and be disciplined in your study habits. Remember that the dictionary is the only place where success comes before work. You have to work at your goals in order to accomplish them
Also, when you set your goals don't allow yourself to be sidetracked by friends, male or female. There is nothing wrong with having a boyfriend. However, there is nothing wrong with not having one either, it's your choice. Nevertheless, assess your plans for your life and see if at this point a boyfriend is really a positive thing. Remember wrong decisions can hinder you from accomplishing your goals.
As Shantel said in her article in the previous issue, "True love waits." I reiterate, there will always be time for relationships. Don't be in too much of a hurry. Take time to try and realise some of your dreams.
Philippians 4:13 says I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. Young lady, you can accomplish your dreams if you work at them.
"Aim for the heavens and you'll fall among the stars!' A good friend recently gave me this advice.
This simply means to dream big. Don't allow your thinking to be limited by what you can see.
You have many dreams for the future, I'm sure. One of your dreams may be to become a lawyer, doctor, businesswomen, teacher, nurse, etc.
Make your dreams your goals, set them high and strive to reach them.
Having set goals is very important, it keeps you focused and give you a sense of purpose.
Whatever your goals in life may be a good education is important. Hence, you have to keep your grades up and be disciplined in your study habits. Remember that the dictionary is the only place where success comes before work. You have to work at your goals in order to accomplish them
Also, when you set your goals don't allow yourself to be sidetracked by friends, male or female. There is nothing wrong with having a boyfriend. However, there is nothing wrong with not having one either, it's your choice. Nevertheless, assess your plans for your life and see if at this point a boyfriend is really a positive thing. Remember wrong decisions can hinder you from accomplishing your goals.
As Shantel said in her article in the previous issue, "True love waits." I reiterate, there will always be time for relationships. Don't be in too much of a hurry. Take time to try and realise some of your dreams.
Philippians 4:13 says I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. Young lady, you can accomplish your dreams if you work at them.
Look Before You Leap
By Shantel Hield
Imagine your best friend calls to tell you her parents are taking her away for the weekend. Imagine they gave her permission to invite a friend, all expense paid. Imagine she chooses you. Your heart starts to beat faster. You have always wanted to go to Disney World. You begin thinking about all the fun you're going to have with your friend. However, just as the word yes was about to come out of your mouth, you hear a demanding cry. Suddenly reality strikes. You remember, your time isn't your own anymore. Just one time you didn't say no and found yourself pregnant at the age of thirteen and a mother at fourteen. This means your life has change totally. You forgot to look before you leap.
Many teenage girls often become victims of this tragedy, that is a child having a child.
Teenage girls must remember to take one step at a time when they begin dating. Your body may blossom suddenly however, your mind takes more time to mature.
Young ladies, take a look at your future before jumping into your present. Do you really want to be a mother before you actually become an adult? Moreover, do you want to be a mother before you become a wife? Just think about what you will miss out on. While your friends are out enjoying their teenage years you will be home taking care of baby. Yes we all have desires, we are only human but we also have a brain so, girlfriend my advice to you is to, use it. Just say no and mean it.
Sept/Nov 2000
Imagine your best friend calls to tell you her parents are taking her away for the weekend. Imagine they gave her permission to invite a friend, all expense paid. Imagine she chooses you. Your heart starts to beat faster. You have always wanted to go to Disney World. You begin thinking about all the fun you're going to have with your friend. However, just as the word yes was about to come out of your mouth, you hear a demanding cry. Suddenly reality strikes. You remember, your time isn't your own anymore. Just one time you didn't say no and found yourself pregnant at the age of thirteen and a mother at fourteen. This means your life has change totally. You forgot to look before you leap.
Many teenage girls often become victims of this tragedy, that is a child having a child.
Teenage girls must remember to take one step at a time when they begin dating. Your body may blossom suddenly however, your mind takes more time to mature.
Young ladies, take a look at your future before jumping into your present. Do you really want to be a mother before you actually become an adult? Moreover, do you want to be a mother before you become a wife? Just think about what you will miss out on. While your friends are out enjoying their teenage years you will be home taking care of baby. Yes we all have desires, we are only human but we also have a brain so, girlfriend my advice to you is to, use it. Just say no and mean it.
Sept/Nov 2000
Let's Talk About Friends
By Bernadine McIntosh
"But I need a friend" this is the plaintive cry of many lonely teenagers.
According to Xenovia Munnings, a twelfth grader, "From the time you are born until you die you need the emotional support of others. Friendship with others offers you the opportunity to develop new interest and skills. When friends support you, she continued, you gain confidence to try new activities."
Friendship is a rare gift. Hence you need to be selective in whom you offer the gift of your friendship. If you choose the wrong friends you can find yourselves in places you don't need to be with people you don't need to be with.
The wrong friend can destroy the plans God has for your life. 1 Corinthians 15:33 says, "Bad company corrupts good character." Many times you may find yourself changing attitudes to fit in with whatever crowd you're hanging out with at the moment. If you hang with the "bad boys" or "bad girls" you may try to act a little tougher. You may curse here and there to make them feel like you're one of the crowd but deep inside you know that's not who you are. You are a unique individual created by God. However if you hang with certain people long enough you will begin to become who they are.
Young ladies, you are characterised by the company you keep. Yes everyone needs a friend however, your friend should bring out positive qualities in you. Any friend who encourages you to do things that you are ashamed of is not a true friend. Psalm 119:9 asks a question, How can a young man (or young woman) keep his way pure? How can you keep yourself out of trouble young ladies? Verse 10 gives the answer. By living according to your (God's) word. I encourage you to take these verses, memorize them and then live them. Be an example to your friends.
"But I need a friend" this is the plaintive cry of many lonely teenagers.
According to Xenovia Munnings, a twelfth grader, "From the time you are born until you die you need the emotional support of others. Friendship with others offers you the opportunity to develop new interest and skills. When friends support you, she continued, you gain confidence to try new activities."
Friendship is a rare gift. Hence you need to be selective in whom you offer the gift of your friendship. If you choose the wrong friends you can find yourselves in places you don't need to be with people you don't need to be with.
The wrong friend can destroy the plans God has for your life. 1 Corinthians 15:33 says, "Bad company corrupts good character." Many times you may find yourself changing attitudes to fit in with whatever crowd you're hanging out with at the moment. If you hang with the "bad boys" or "bad girls" you may try to act a little tougher. You may curse here and there to make them feel like you're one of the crowd but deep inside you know that's not who you are. You are a unique individual created by God. However if you hang with certain people long enough you will begin to become who they are.
Young ladies, you are characterised by the company you keep. Yes everyone needs a friend however, your friend should bring out positive qualities in you. Any friend who encourages you to do things that you are ashamed of is not a true friend. Psalm 119:9 asks a question, How can a young man (or young woman) keep his way pure? How can you keep yourself out of trouble young ladies? Verse 10 gives the answer. By living according to your (God's) word. I encourage you to take these verses, memorize them and then live them. Be an example to your friends.
Love is Blind
By Shantel Hield
Read this carefully!
"Love is blind and it can take over your mind. What you think is love, it's truly not. You've got to elevate and fly." Eve, a new and popular rap artist sang in one of her songs.
These words are the painful truth. Many times young ladies are blinded by their emotions. They allow their feelings to be their guide. Too often they may think they are in love when in actuality they are simply infatuated.
Many young ladies can benefit from following the lyrics of this song. "We don't have to take our clothes off to have a good time." Young ladies sometimes rely on their bodies to please or keep a guy. Why can't we let our minds and characters do the convincing? If we want a guy lets show him who we are.
Some young ladies choose to have sex with a guy, thinking it is the normal thing to do. They believe that in order to be a "real" couple you have to have sex. Too many times girls give in to sex because they feel they are in love and when you are in love you have sex. This is wrong! Don't let your emotions put a sheet over your head. Don't let your heart do the thinking. God designed your mind to think.
Young ladies, if a guy claim to love you but can't wait for you, he's not
worth having. Tell him in the words of Toni Braxton "You're not man enough for me!" True love waits!
Let the word sex mean this to you.
S - Setting my mind on better things.
E - Eliminating the wrong things.
X - Exercising the right thing.
Take my advice, elevate and fly.
Girl Talk June/August 2000
Read this carefully!
"Love is blind and it can take over your mind. What you think is love, it's truly not. You've got to elevate and fly." Eve, a new and popular rap artist sang in one of her songs.
These words are the painful truth. Many times young ladies are blinded by their emotions. They allow their feelings to be their guide. Too often they may think they are in love when in actuality they are simply infatuated.
Many young ladies can benefit from following the lyrics of this song. "We don't have to take our clothes off to have a good time." Young ladies sometimes rely on their bodies to please or keep a guy. Why can't we let our minds and characters do the convincing? If we want a guy lets show him who we are.
Some young ladies choose to have sex with a guy, thinking it is the normal thing to do. They believe that in order to be a "real" couple you have to have sex. Too many times girls give in to sex because they feel they are in love and when you are in love you have sex. This is wrong! Don't let your emotions put a sheet over your head. Don't let your heart do the thinking. God designed your mind to think.
Young ladies, if a guy claim to love you but can't wait for you, he's not
worth having. Tell him in the words of Toni Braxton "You're not man enough for me!" True love waits!
Let the word sex mean this to you.
S - Setting my mind on better things.
E - Eliminating the wrong things.
X - Exercising the right thing.
Take my advice, elevate and fly.
Girl Talk June/August 2000
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
A Grateful Friend
(Conclusion to A Teen’s Fear)
by B. McIntosh & S. Gould
Elaine could hardly wait to reach home to open the envelope that Dawn had given her. She couldn’t imagine what could possibly be inside. It felt too bulky to be just a letter. The short journey to her house had never seemed so long. She was tempted to tear open the envelope on the way but Dawn had made her promise that she would wait until she got home.
As soon as Elaine reached her doorstep she started tearing open the envelope. As she opened it a gold chain with half of a gold heart charm, with the word “best” inscribed on it fell out.
“Oh, wow! This is beautiful!” Elaine thought. “ I wonder why Dawn gave this to me. My birthday was months ago.” She looked into the envelope and took out the letter that Dawn had written. It said,
Dear Lainie
I wanted to write you a little note to let you know that I appreciate the help you gave me in my time of need. When my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer I felt scared and alone. You being there for me helped me out a lot. You didn’t offer a whole lot of platitudes you simply listened when I needed someone to talk to or just a shoulder to cry on. Oh and I can’t forget the fact that you prayed for me. That kept me going.
I’m giving you this chain so that you’ll always be reminded of how much you mean to me. I have the second half of the charm. Yours says “best” and mine says “friend.” Whenever you look at your half just know that you’ll always have a friend in me. I will always be there for you, just like you were there for me.
Many people think they have the best friend in the world, but I know I do. Thanks again Lainie, for everything.
Love,
Dawn
“ Oh wow!” Elaine thought as she read the note. “Wow! I think Dawn is mistaken. I definitely have the best friend in the world.” At that moment she realized that she was still standing on the steps of her house.
“If Dawn could see me now she’d think I’m the worse than a little kid on Christmas morning” she thought, unconsciously echoing Dawn’s thought. “Well” she shrugged; at least I made it home before I opened it. On that note Elaine opened the door to her home and walked in happily humming Michael W. Smiths famous song,
Friends are friends forever, if the Lord’s the Lord of them, and a friend will not say never ‘cause the welcome never ends…
Well ladies, I hope you like the conclusion of A Teen’s Fear. I don’t know about you but this makes me miss my best friend.
by B. McIntosh & S. Gould
Elaine could hardly wait to reach home to open the envelope that Dawn had given her. She couldn’t imagine what could possibly be inside. It felt too bulky to be just a letter. The short journey to her house had never seemed so long. She was tempted to tear open the envelope on the way but Dawn had made her promise that she would wait until she got home.
As soon as Elaine reached her doorstep she started tearing open the envelope. As she opened it a gold chain with half of a gold heart charm, with the word “best” inscribed on it fell out.
“Oh, wow! This is beautiful!” Elaine thought. “ I wonder why Dawn gave this to me. My birthday was months ago.” She looked into the envelope and took out the letter that Dawn had written. It said,
Dear Lainie
I wanted to write you a little note to let you know that I appreciate the help you gave me in my time of need. When my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer I felt scared and alone. You being there for me helped me out a lot. You didn’t offer a whole lot of platitudes you simply listened when I needed someone to talk to or just a shoulder to cry on. Oh and I can’t forget the fact that you prayed for me. That kept me going.
I’m giving you this chain so that you’ll always be reminded of how much you mean to me. I have the second half of the charm. Yours says “best” and mine says “friend.” Whenever you look at your half just know that you’ll always have a friend in me. I will always be there for you, just like you were there for me.
Many people think they have the best friend in the world, but I know I do. Thanks again Lainie, for everything.
Love,
Dawn
“ Oh wow!” Elaine thought as she read the note. “Wow! I think Dawn is mistaken. I definitely have the best friend in the world.” At that moment she realized that she was still standing on the steps of her house.
“If Dawn could see me now she’d think I’m the worse than a little kid on Christmas morning” she thought, unconsciously echoing Dawn’s thought. “Well” she shrugged; at least I made it home before I opened it. On that note Elaine opened the door to her home and walked in happily humming Michael W. Smiths famous song,
Friends are friends forever, if the Lord’s the Lord of them, and a friend will not say never ‘cause the welcome never ends…
Well ladies, I hope you like the conclusion of A Teen’s Fear. I don’t know about you but this makes me miss my best friend.
A Friend in Need (Conclusion to A Teen's Fear)
by B. McIntosh
It was a beautiful summer day. The sun was shining, the birds were twittering in the trees, butterflies were flitting from flower to flower, trees swayed gently in the breeze and the happy chatter of children could be heard all around. However Dawn and Elaine neither saw the beauty of the day or heard the sounds as they walked slowly home from school. They were too excited to be together after being away from each other for yet another summer. Although school had been opened for three weeks they were still finding new things to tell each other about.
As Dawn chattered excitedly to Elaine about something that had happened in one of her classes Elaine’s attention wavered from the conversation. She thought about how good it was to see Dawn so happy and excited again. Dawn had had a very difficult year and had become depressed after learning that her mother had been diagnosed with breast cancer. Elaine had been very concerned about her friend who worried constantly that her mother would die and cried at the drop of a hat. Fortunately, after having a mastectomy and doing months of chemotherapy Dawn’s mother was doing great and was told that there was no sigh of cancer in her body.
“So what do you think about that Lainie?” Dawn’s question brought Elaine’s attention back to the one sided conversation.
“What do I think about what?”
“Hey! Where were you a moment ago? Weren’t you listening to anything I said?”
“Sure I was,” Elaine laughingly protested.
“Uh hmmm? So what was I talking about?”
“Okay, you caught me. I admit it. I wasn’t listening. I was just thinking about when school opened last year how your mom was so sick.”
“Yeah, that’s still hard to think about,” Dawn replied. “I was so scared. But thank God she’s doing great now. Dad finally allowed her to go back to work. I think he was more scared than he let on.”
“I guess he had to be strong for you and your mom.”
“I was a big crybaby huh?”
“Well…”
“Okay, okay” Dawn laughed, “You don’t have to answer that.”
“Whew! Thanks,” Elaine joked wiping an imaginary drop of sweat from her brow.
“Oh stop it,” Dawn smiled, pushing her friend gently.
At that moment they came to a stop in front of the place where they separated to go home.
“Wait a minute,” Dawn called as Elaine turned in the direction of her home. “I have something for you.”
“Really? Did I forget my own birthday or something?”
“Oh stop being silly,” Dawn said and handed Elaine an envelope with her name on it.
“What is it?” Elaine asked.
“You’ll find out soon enough,” Dawn replied. “Please don’t open it until you get home.”
“Well bye then Dawn, I gotta go I have a something to do,” Elaine said hurrying off before Dawn even answered.
“Good thing I waited until we reached,” Dawn thought crossly. “She’s worst than a little kid on Christmas morning.” But she started smiling as she walked towards home thinking that although Elaine was the most curious person she knew, she was also the best friend ever.
It was a beautiful summer day. The sun was shining, the birds were twittering in the trees, butterflies were flitting from flower to flower, trees swayed gently in the breeze and the happy chatter of children could be heard all around. However Dawn and Elaine neither saw the beauty of the day or heard the sounds as they walked slowly home from school. They were too excited to be together after being away from each other for yet another summer. Although school had been opened for three weeks they were still finding new things to tell each other about.
As Dawn chattered excitedly to Elaine about something that had happened in one of her classes Elaine’s attention wavered from the conversation. She thought about how good it was to see Dawn so happy and excited again. Dawn had had a very difficult year and had become depressed after learning that her mother had been diagnosed with breast cancer. Elaine had been very concerned about her friend who worried constantly that her mother would die and cried at the drop of a hat. Fortunately, after having a mastectomy and doing months of chemotherapy Dawn’s mother was doing great and was told that there was no sigh of cancer in her body.
“So what do you think about that Lainie?” Dawn’s question brought Elaine’s attention back to the one sided conversation.
“What do I think about what?”
“Hey! Where were you a moment ago? Weren’t you listening to anything I said?”
“Sure I was,” Elaine laughingly protested.
“Uh hmmm? So what was I talking about?”
“Okay, you caught me. I admit it. I wasn’t listening. I was just thinking about when school opened last year how your mom was so sick.”
“Yeah, that’s still hard to think about,” Dawn replied. “I was so scared. But thank God she’s doing great now. Dad finally allowed her to go back to work. I think he was more scared than he let on.”
“I guess he had to be strong for you and your mom.”
“I was a big crybaby huh?”
“Well…”
“Okay, okay” Dawn laughed, “You don’t have to answer that.”
“Whew! Thanks,” Elaine joked wiping an imaginary drop of sweat from her brow.
“Oh stop it,” Dawn smiled, pushing her friend gently.
At that moment they came to a stop in front of the place where they separated to go home.
“Wait a minute,” Dawn called as Elaine turned in the direction of her home. “I have something for you.”
“Really? Did I forget my own birthday or something?”
“Oh stop being silly,” Dawn said and handed Elaine an envelope with her name on it.
“What is it?” Elaine asked.
“You’ll find out soon enough,” Dawn replied. “Please don’t open it until you get home.”
“Well bye then Dawn, I gotta go I have a something to do,” Elaine said hurrying off before Dawn even answered.
“Good thing I waited until we reached,” Dawn thought crossly. “She’s worst than a little kid on Christmas morning.” But she started smiling as she walked towards home thinking that although Elaine was the most curious person she knew, she was also the best friend ever.
A Teen's Fear Part 3
By B McIntosh & S Hield
"Hi Dawn," Elaine said smiling. "I was just thinking about you. You're in a good mood today. What's up?"
"The price of clothes," Dawn smiled. "
Ha, ha, my friend the comedienne. Did you get some good news about your mom? Did the doctors make a mistake?
"I wish," Dawn said, the smile vanishing from her face.
"Uh oh," Elaine thought, "now I've done it. She's going to cry again".
"She's okay though," Dawn said surprising Lainie by not crying. "She and my dad talked to me last night. She's decided to go ahead with the mastectomy. She'll be having the surgery next week."
"So how come you were so happy?" Elaine enquired, "before I spoiled it that is. You've been so depressed lately."
"It's strange really, after Mommy and Daddy finished talking we all prayed. Well anyway they prayed and I listened. I was still a bit upset with God so I kinda kept quiet. Maybe it was for the best though."
"Why is that?" Elaine asked.
"I really listened to my parents pray and as they prayed I started crying. I didn't even realize I was crying until I felt Mommy patting my head and saying "don't cry baby, it'll be alright."
"Big baby, I bet you cried even more huh?'
" You know it girl, especially after she started praying again.'
"What did she say?"
"She said, please Lord let me live to see my baby grow up. Elaine, she didn't even pray to live for herself, she prayed for me."
"Wow," Elaine said. I think we'd better change the subject before we both start crying again.
"Yeah, let's do", Dawn laughed.
"So do you think you're going to be okay now? I mean your grades have been slipping lately, you have to pull them back up."
"Yeah, I don't think my parents would appreciate seeing a bad Report Card on top of everything else.
"I bet they'd take a belt to you," Elaine teased.
"Or ground me forever…"
"Yeah, no phone…" Elaine continued.
"No email or instant messenger, Dawn added.
"Poor, poor Dawn ", Elaine laughed.
"No sleepovers, Dawn continued.
"No sleepover? Hey this affects me too. Girlfriend let's go hit the books."
"Hi Dawn," Elaine said smiling. "I was just thinking about you. You're in a good mood today. What's up?"
"The price of clothes," Dawn smiled. "
Ha, ha, my friend the comedienne. Did you get some good news about your mom? Did the doctors make a mistake?
"I wish," Dawn said, the smile vanishing from her face.
"Uh oh," Elaine thought, "now I've done it. She's going to cry again".
"She's okay though," Dawn said surprising Lainie by not crying. "She and my dad talked to me last night. She's decided to go ahead with the mastectomy. She'll be having the surgery next week."
"So how come you were so happy?" Elaine enquired, "before I spoiled it that is. You've been so depressed lately."
"It's strange really, after Mommy and Daddy finished talking we all prayed. Well anyway they prayed and I listened. I was still a bit upset with God so I kinda kept quiet. Maybe it was for the best though."
"Why is that?" Elaine asked.
"I really listened to my parents pray and as they prayed I started crying. I didn't even realize I was crying until I felt Mommy patting my head and saying "don't cry baby, it'll be alright."
"Big baby, I bet you cried even more huh?'
" You know it girl, especially after she started praying again.'
"What did she say?"
"She said, please Lord let me live to see my baby grow up. Elaine, she didn't even pray to live for herself, she prayed for me."
"Wow," Elaine said. I think we'd better change the subject before we both start crying again.
"Yeah, let's do", Dawn laughed.
"So do you think you're going to be okay now? I mean your grades have been slipping lately, you have to pull them back up."
"Yeah, I don't think my parents would appreciate seeing a bad Report Card on top of everything else.
"I bet they'd take a belt to you," Elaine teased.
"Or ground me forever…"
"Yeah, no phone…" Elaine continued.
"No email or instant messenger, Dawn added.
"Poor, poor Dawn ", Elaine laughed.
"No sleepovers, Dawn continued.
"No sleepover? Hey this affects me too. Girlfriend let's go hit the books."
A Teen's Fear
Part 2
By B McIntosh & S Hield
Three weeks later Elaine was still reeling with shock. She couldn't believe the news Dawn had given her. Mrs. Thurston, Dawn's mother had been diagnosed with breast cancer. Elaine was still worried about Dawn. School had only been opened a few weeks but Dawn's grades were already slipping.
"I don't know how to help her", Lainie thought. Her mind went back to the conversation she'd had with Dawn.
"I'm scared Lainie," Dawn had said. "I don't know what I'd do if I lost my mom."
"I'm sure she's going to be fine Dawn" Lainie said hugging Dawn sympathetically. "Have you talked to your mom?"
At that question Dawn started crying even more. "I'm trying not to let her see how scared I am. I don't want her to worry about me. She's the one who's sick. I should be taking care of her."
"I'm sure your mom would want to know how you're feeling Dawn. You should try talking to her. By the way, how is your dad taking it?"
"He's trying to be strong but neither of us can imagine life without mom."
"Dawn you have to stop being so negative," Elaine said. "Cancer doesn't have to be a death sentence you know many women survive breast cancer."
"I know Lainie but my mom's sister died from that a few years ago, remember? And now the doctors have recommended that my mom have a mastectomy and my aunt had her breast removed also."
"Dawn where's your faith?" Elaine asked. "Have you prayed about this?
"Lainie, I'm scared to pray because I don't know what will happen to my faith if God doesn't answer."
"On that note a tear came to Lainie's eye but she didn't let Dawn see. "Well to quote the words of that old song, that's what friends are for," she said. "Let's stop here for a minute."
Elaine and Dawn stopped under a tree and Elaine held her friend's hand and said a short, simple prayer. She asked God to comfort Dawn and her family and to heal Dawn's mother. "I know you are a healer, God she finished and I'm believing you will perform a miracle on Dawn's mother amen.
"Earth to Elaine, earth to Elaine. Elaine came to herself with a start realizing that the object of her thoughts Dawn was calling her name. "She's looking a lot happier Elaine thought as Dawn walked towards her.
(Is Dawn's mother going to be okay? How will Dawn handle it if she's not? Stay tuned for the next installment of "A Teen's Fear" In fact why don't you send me your suggestions or leave them on the forum board at geocities.com/kirgt.)
By B McIntosh & S Hield
Three weeks later Elaine was still reeling with shock. She couldn't believe the news Dawn had given her. Mrs. Thurston, Dawn's mother had been diagnosed with breast cancer. Elaine was still worried about Dawn. School had only been opened a few weeks but Dawn's grades were already slipping.
"I don't know how to help her", Lainie thought. Her mind went back to the conversation she'd had with Dawn.
"I'm scared Lainie," Dawn had said. "I don't know what I'd do if I lost my mom."
"I'm sure she's going to be fine Dawn" Lainie said hugging Dawn sympathetically. "Have you talked to your mom?"
At that question Dawn started crying even more. "I'm trying not to let her see how scared I am. I don't want her to worry about me. She's the one who's sick. I should be taking care of her."
"I'm sure your mom would want to know how you're feeling Dawn. You should try talking to her. By the way, how is your dad taking it?"
"He's trying to be strong but neither of us can imagine life without mom."
"Dawn you have to stop being so negative," Elaine said. "Cancer doesn't have to be a death sentence you know many women survive breast cancer."
"I know Lainie but my mom's sister died from that a few years ago, remember? And now the doctors have recommended that my mom have a mastectomy and my aunt had her breast removed also."
"Dawn where's your faith?" Elaine asked. "Have you prayed about this?
"Lainie, I'm scared to pray because I don't know what will happen to my faith if God doesn't answer."
"On that note a tear came to Lainie's eye but she didn't let Dawn see. "Well to quote the words of that old song, that's what friends are for," she said. "Let's stop here for a minute."
Elaine and Dawn stopped under a tree and Elaine held her friend's hand and said a short, simple prayer. She asked God to comfort Dawn and her family and to heal Dawn's mother. "I know you are a healer, God she finished and I'm believing you will perform a miracle on Dawn's mother amen.
"Earth to Elaine, earth to Elaine. Elaine came to herself with a start realizing that the object of her thoughts Dawn was calling her name. "She's looking a lot happier Elaine thought as Dawn walked towards her.
(Is Dawn's mother going to be okay? How will Dawn handle it if she's not? Stay tuned for the next installment of "A Teen's Fear" In fact why don't you send me your suggestions or leave them on the forum board at geocities.com/kirgt.)
A Teen's Fear
By B McIntosh & S Hield
Elaine walked excitedly to the place where she and Dawn usually met to walk to school. After a long summer apart she was eager to see her best friend. Dawn had stayed home for most of the summer whereas Elaine had spent the entire summer in Florida with family. Although she and Dawn had emailed each other every day it just wasn't the same.
Elaine arrived a few minutes early and waited for Dawn. She pulled out a little gift she'd had specially made for Dawn. It was a little plaque that read "Dawn and Elaine, Friends through thick and thin." As Elaine looked up she saw Dawn approaching.
"Dawn?" she said questioningly, her eyes popping open in amazement.
"What? Forgot how I looked already?" Dawn replied hugging her friend as if nothing was wrong.
Lainie returned the hug but questioned Dawn, "What happened to you?"
"What are you talking about Lainie?" Dawn asked. "Nothing's happened to me."
"Dawn you look as if you've lost twenty pounds. Missed me that much? She teased although still worried.
"Don't be silly Lainie!" Dawn laughed nervously. It isn't that much.
"Is everything alright Dawn? Elaine asked seriously.
"Yes Elaine, Dawn answered in a long suffering voice.
"You'd tell me if it wasn't?
"Of course! Now can we please change the subject? How was your vacation?
"It was the best, except I missed you."
Elaine handed Dawn the gift. Dawn read the words as they walked.
"I really mean it Dawn, Elaine said. I hope you trust me enough to tell me if something is wrong."
"Thanks Lainie Dawn said, sounding as if she was holding back tears. "I just can't talk about it right now. "
"So something is wrong! I knew it! What is it?"
"Please not now Lainie Dawn said. If I talk about it I'm going to cry and I can't go to school on the first day with red eyes."
"Okay, okay, I'll back off, for now. How is Mrs. T (Elaine name for Dawn's mother) doing? You mentioned in one of your emails that she wasn't feeling well.
"At that question Dawn burst into tears while an astonished Lainie looked on not knowing what to do.
(What is Dawn upset about? Stay tuned for the next installment to this new chapter in the lives of Dawn and Elaine.)
Elaine walked excitedly to the place where she and Dawn usually met to walk to school. After a long summer apart she was eager to see her best friend. Dawn had stayed home for most of the summer whereas Elaine had spent the entire summer in Florida with family. Although she and Dawn had emailed each other every day it just wasn't the same.
Elaine arrived a few minutes early and waited for Dawn. She pulled out a little gift she'd had specially made for Dawn. It was a little plaque that read "Dawn and Elaine, Friends through thick and thin." As Elaine looked up she saw Dawn approaching.
"Dawn?" she said questioningly, her eyes popping open in amazement.
"What? Forgot how I looked already?" Dawn replied hugging her friend as if nothing was wrong.
Lainie returned the hug but questioned Dawn, "What happened to you?"
"What are you talking about Lainie?" Dawn asked. "Nothing's happened to me."
"Dawn you look as if you've lost twenty pounds. Missed me that much? She teased although still worried.
"Don't be silly Lainie!" Dawn laughed nervously. It isn't that much.
"Is everything alright Dawn? Elaine asked seriously.
"Yes Elaine, Dawn answered in a long suffering voice.
"You'd tell me if it wasn't?
"Of course! Now can we please change the subject? How was your vacation?
"It was the best, except I missed you."
Elaine handed Dawn the gift. Dawn read the words as they walked.
"I really mean it Dawn, Elaine said. I hope you trust me enough to tell me if something is wrong."
"Thanks Lainie Dawn said, sounding as if she was holding back tears. "I just can't talk about it right now. "
"So something is wrong! I knew it! What is it?"
"Please not now Lainie Dawn said. If I talk about it I'm going to cry and I can't go to school on the first day with red eyes."
"Okay, okay, I'll back off, for now. How is Mrs. T (Elaine name for Dawn's mother) doing? You mentioned in one of your emails that she wasn't feeling well.
"At that question Dawn burst into tears while an astonished Lainie looked on not knowing what to do.
(What is Dawn upset about? Stay tuned for the next installment to this new chapter in the lives of Dawn and Elaine.)
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